It is all parents aim to be the best parent they can be.
But parenting has changed, children changed, the world changed.
I am now in my 50, and still remember how I was raised and how my brothers and sisters and cousins were: newborn babies were isolated for the first six weeks. quit, sterile white rooms, protecting the baby from noise and pollution. Babies tied up in big pillows, legs straightened and silence all around. Till their christening only very close family could see or visit them.
Thank to the 70 hippies who liberated a little on this "expectations" exposing their babies to their community earlier and freeing the children from the baby pillows. This practices all were forgotten soon as the white sterile rooms idea has the change to exposing the babies to the "messy" out word to gain immunity and socializing from the very beginning of their life.
So, there you go by the 90 babies were born into the daily lives, mums went to work earlier or became stay at home Mums, traveling with babies became easier and many products were invented to ease the parents and babies life.
So many things were changed but did parenting rules changed along with them? Did we ever actually upgrade on the parenting rules or we just liberated and forgot some that were uncomfortable for us?
Who is a good parent; the strict one, the allowing one, the loving one?
The strict one, who still believes that the only way to raise successful kids is by demanding that only parents can know better and expecting their children to live after their rules entirely?
The allowing one, who allows their children entirely to choose and behave as they want, allowing any agreeing all behai=vior saying that this is the only way the can gain life experience?
The loving one. who in the name of love, and in the fear of being not loved by their kids are allowing and fulfilling all expectations of their kids at all prices?
In the meantime, all life factors are changing so fast, communication inside and outside families had been changing so quickly, and parenting has become challenging.
The freedom of expression and to an opinion has a significant impact, exposing our family live on social sites where we open our bedroom and kids room doors, and people can take a look in our everyday life without picking on the key hole, but they can get information directly and with our agreement.
All operational system around us had been upgraded, but did we ever upgraded our parenting programs?
What kidn of parent is the 21th Century parent?
I had the fantastic luck to be parent of a child born in the 80 just before the iron curtain felt down.
I admit today that I used to be a very confused parent. Struggling with my first child between the strict, allowing and loving parenting styles I did not very well. I kind of blew it up. Looking back today I know this.
Now, with my second born in the bloom and gloom of technology of the year 2003 and growing up in the world of apps and techno tools new challenges and a completely new vision of what a parent is for.
My second child is a real cyber child, and yes I know that many of you reading this will immediately challenge my new parenting methods.
He discover the world of technology and using this in everyday life since he was 7.years of age.
He learned through technology reading, maths, science. He leanred and studied and his tutor was Google.
Ask Google, he says if you have a question that nobody can answer.
"Google knows everything! "
Just before you roar up, OK this is to much I ask you to honestly answer this question: was there ever that you type something in Google and Google did wrote back: I do not know?
No, Google has millions of answers to all our questions, all we need to develop is the ability to choose the right answer for us.
And there is the same with parenting. We can be choose our way of parenting today form the hundreds of trends around the world, it is our decision which way we go.
And freedom is sweet and good but freedom also can create confusion.
I meet many confused parents everyday.
Her below I had collected the most frequent questions that I receive:
Should we allow the kids to use technology form a very young age?
What is the optimal screen time?
How can we protect our children online?
What is the best schooling; the classical or the e learning?
How to communicate with our kids all buried n games and social media?
Who should we listen; our kids or parenting advisers?
When kids do not perform well in school is this the fault of the teachers. the system or os there something wrong with my child?
Should I buy my kids the latest technology tools or should I still buy the a ball and send them out to the backyard to fresh air?
Should I look for alliterative education or the classical style will be always the good basics for life?
Should my child have the freedom to choose or should I make the choice and always have the last word in decisions?
Gathering together the last 30 years studies, knowledge, research and personal parenting experience here are the 5 most important things that will allow you to became a great life companion for your kids.
1. Be proactive.
2. Your kid can know better.
3. Talk openly and engage conversation with your kids.
4. Your dreams and expectations are not your child dreams and expectation.
5. Never say NO! Explain the why not.
So, let me know what are your thoughts about the above 5 and follow up my blog as in the next 5 will be about working out each of these above so you can understand better and offering you some kid of guidance and comfort.
What will you adopt and what is working for your and you and your family? Well that is and always be your choice!
Be the magnificent parent behind the success of your kid and enjoy the blessings of every moment of the celebration!
Abracadabra to you!
Parenting Expert, Author and Mummager
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